I was talking to a young woman I know about eyebrow threading and my preference to it over waxing. We acknowledged that threading hurts a lot more but I offered that the results are cleaner with threading. She was focused on the pain though. This is how the conversation ends:
Her: How do you stand the pain?
Me: Pain is temporary.
Her: LMFAO
Me: What?
Her: Pain is not temporary.
Me: Not for victims. Only for survivors.
Her: Real shit.
Me: I know.
I hope she walked away realizing that your relationship to something is dependent upon how you choose to look at it. Photographers and artists create masterpieces by seeing beyond what the eyes view. In my opinion, this is also the “art” of therapy. If I stay stuck in the problem that caused my patient to seek treatment how do I show them out of it?
I don’t ever want to disrespect or belittle the fact that there are people who have been victimized beyond their control but I will always argue that each of them holds the power to decide whether they are victims or survivors of said victimization.
It’s all about how you CHOOSE to look at something. We cannot choose how people treat us but we can and must choose how to respond.